Post by alleywayrover on Jul 19, 2018 23:39:57 GMT -7
*walks into the room*
So... I can shamelessly plug what I am doing here?
It says shameless on the board.
And I am shameless.
Seriously. No shame right here.
*leaves room*
*returns with a fully functioning circus and myself dressed up as a ringmaster*
Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Step right up! Get your post, post, post apocalyptic, science fiction, space opera, space adventure.... bloody hell any other keywords Amazon will let me stick in. Step right up, get you copy right here.
BOOM!
But wait, you might be saying to yourself, that's just the eBook. Just some words on a screen. That's not enough for me. I'm a person of sophistication. Of high integrity. I eat caviar and.... oh I dunno maybe like Cooks Champagne or something. I cannot be satisfied by words on a screen. People read garbage on their phones. I'm better than that. Don't you worry, I have the answer right here....
BOOM!
You can hold it in your hand! You can throw it at somebody! Preferably somebody you don't like. But who am I to judge?
But wait, wait, wait, wait a minute! I know what you are saying to yourself. Your saying Alleyway Rover. You are a rover. Who lives in an alleyway. Presumably. Why should we possibly believe that you wrote anything but the word 'Gotcha Suckers!!!' A hundred thousand times with a couple of poop jokes in the middle?
You know what, that is understandable. That is totally something I might do. But I'll let you all in on a little secret. Something not everyone knows. You wanna get a sneak peek at the book.
Here we go...
BLAMOOO!
That's right ladies and gentlemen. You don't have to take my word for it. You can enjoy the thrilling saga of Saturnius Mons read by yours truly. In your ears. Live! Well not actually live, but, you know if it makes you feel better, imagine I'm in the room with you reading to you as you sleep. Actually, strike that, don't think that. It's as uncomfortable for you as it is for me. But I will read you the story. Just very, very far away.
Good?
Good!
Okay let's review.
There's the eBook.
There's the Paperback
And there's the Podcast
And coming soon! Saturnius Mons the audiobook!
And more books!
Look out for Templum Veneris coming in the summer of 2019!
And..... that's all I got.
*steals bottle of tequila from the bearded lady and walks away*
